"I've wanted a baby my whole life. I would play with dolls and Barbies and pretend I was the mom. I started babysitting for cash when I was 11 years old. If there was a party and there were younger children, I was the one playing with all the kids. After I got married, my spouse and I invested $30,000 in doctor appointments, surgeries and procedures to get pregnant.
Then when I had my son, I instantly felt like, I don't want this baby. I don't want anything to do with this baby.
How did I spend so much money and do all this, and now I'm looking at this baby and I want nothing to do with the baby?
I was almost wishing it never happened. It was very strange for me to have such strong feelings about wanting to be a mother and then finally have a baby and not feel that way anymore – it really rocked my world."