An unbelievable full circle moment happened for me in 2011. After striking up a friendship with Jane Wiedlin years prior, I was seeing the Go Go’s perform at The Greek Theater in celebration of their first album, Beauty and the Beat. To my surprise, Jane called me onto the stage to dance as they fired up their cover of Cool Jerk. If you watch the clip on YouTube, you can see me leave my body.
For a brief moment, I’m 13 again in my living room, coping the only way I know how: finding joy in our 19” mono TV, pretending to be Belinda Carlisle, and wearing out my VHS of them live at The Greek.
But when I re-enter my body, everything is in technicolor, and I’m dancing between Belinda and Kathy.
My escape was a dream – and now my dream is real.
That moment filled me with so much gratitude and pride for never having given up on myself when it felt like no one else liked me. When it felt like I wasn’t cool or interesting enough – or worst of all, that I was unworthy of joy.
In that moment I was literally living my dream. And I realized I deserved joy all along.